The board · United States
BDSM contacts in New York
New York holds the deepest queue anywhere on this board, and depth is not the same as luck. You can set the radius to a couple of miles and still never reach the end of the stack, which means everyone reading your post has forty other things to read. Reply rates are the lowest here for exactly that reason. The boroughs behave like separate apps, so people say which one they are in before anything else.
Posts come from Manhattan, Brooklyn, Queens, the Bronx and the Jersey side. On an app that is a radius setting. Here people say it in words.
Dominant in New York
Leading, and saying in the post what that actually means to them.
-
Text only, and it is not a preference
Looking for: a submissive who is a good writer and does not mind saying so
Ten years, two dynamics, the longer one four years.
I am deaf. Somewhere in the last two years this app filled up with voice notes, and about a third of the messages I now receive are useless to me. People send thirty seconds of audio, get nothing back, and conclude I am rude.
-
Six people asked me to teach them this year, all in a first message
Looking for: somebody newer who wants to learn, on terms written down first
Twenty two years, three long dynamics, a lot of time spent explaining.
Six people have asked me to mentor them this year. Every one of them asked in a first message, and not one of them asked what that would involve. I find that worrying rather than flattering, because the version of this arrangement that goes wrong goes wrong exactly there, in the gap where nobody defined anything.
-
I am ending three four month conversations this week
Looking for: somebody who wants an arrangement rather than a pen pal
Fifteen years, four dynamics, all of them started within a fortnight.
Three conversations on my phone are more than four months old. Each is pleasant. Each involves somebody I like. None has produced a single meeting, and this week I am closing all three, because I have finally admitted that they are not the beginning of anything, they are the thing itself.
-
I want the same evening every week for a year
Looking for: somebody who finds a standing arrangement appealing rather than dull
Sixteen years, three arrangements, the longest of them six.
I want one evening a week, the same evening, for at least a year. When I say that out loud people react as though I have proposed something far stranger than anything else on this board. Ask for a scene and everybody nods. Ask for a Tuesday, repeated, indefinitely, and you get a long pause.
Submissive in New York
Submitting, on terms set out before anyone opens a conversation.
-
Fifty two, and this is the first profile I have ever made anywhere
Looking for: patience, and somebody who will not treat my age as a novelty
None in practice. A very long time of knowing.
In February I made the first profile of my life. Not my first profile of this kind. My first profile of any kind, anywhere, ever. I was married for twenty three years and the internet happened to other people while I was raising two children who are now adults with their own homes.
-
Submissive, and none of what I want is on the app's list
Looking for: authority and service with nothing sexual attached to it
Six years, two arrangements, neither of them sexual.
The app asked me to pick from a list of about forty things I might be into and there was no box for the only thing I actually want. Every filter it offers assumes the point is sex. For me it is not, it never has been, and I have spent six years explaining that to people who think I am being coy.
-
Forty tick boxes and not one of them describes what I am for
Looking for: obedience and correction with no implement anywhere near it
Eight years, four dynamics, none of them involving impact.
Setting up the profile means ticking your way through about forty activities, and I ticked almost nothing, which the app then translated into a person with no interests. What I want is not on the list because it is not an activity. It is being answerable to somebody.
Switch in New York
Both directions, and looking for someone who can follow the change.
-
I took two months off and came back invisible
Looking for: somebody who found this post rather than found me in the queue
Six years, two dynamics, one of them four years.
I took two months off in the spring for entirely ordinary reasons and came back to almost nothing. Same profile, same photographs, same everything, and a fraction of what I used to get. Whether that is the app deciding I am stale or simply the queue having moved on, I cannot tell, and there is nobody to ask.
-
The stack showed me a colleague and neither of us has mentioned it
Looking for: somebody outside my industry, which is a filter the app cannot do
Seven years, two dynamics, both kept entirely separate from work.
The app showed me somebody I sit two desks from. We did not match. I am fairly sure he saw me, because he has been very slightly odd since, and neither of us is ever going to raise it. There is no version of that conversation that improves anybody's week.
-
I only exist on here between seven and eight in the morning
Looking for: somebody who answers in the same hour I do
Four years, two dynamics, both of them ended by distance.
My entire presence on this app happens on a train between seven and eight in the morning. That is the only hour of my day that belongs to nobody, and by the evening I have two children fed, homework supervised and about forty minutes of consciousness left, none of which I am spending on a stack.
Before you write your own
Reading the board tells you what lands. These four decisions happen before you write a word.
- The same person, compressed into an app bio
- Honest and anonymous are two separate dials
- A handle nothing about you comes back from
- What a photo says before anybody reads the words
Other cities
The board runs in 21 places.
Los AngelesMiamiHoustonDallasLondonManchesterLiverpoolBirminghamGlasgowBerlinHamburgMadridParisLyonAmsterdamSão PauloRio de JaneiroTorontoSydneyMoscow
Post yours in New York
Reading them costs nothing. Putting your own where people near you will see it, and answering theirs, happens in the app this site connects to.