This is a small pool and I have stopped pretending otherwise
- Looking for
- one good arrangement rather than the illusion of choice
- Experience
- Thirteen years, four arrangements, two of them long.
- Around
- the south side, Glasgow
I have been through this city's queue enough times to know roughly how many people are in it, and it is a lot smaller than the app makes it feel. Widening the radius adds motorway rather than people. The honest number of people here who want what I want and are available is small enough to count.
Once you accept that, everything changes. You stop treating a promising conversation as one of many. You stop declining somebody over a photograph. You get a lot more careful about how you end things, because you will see all of these people again.
Forty five, the south side, switch, thirteen years in, four arrangements and two of them lasted years.
What I want is one ongoing arrangement, both directions in time, agreed properly, with a fixed evening and reporting between. I am not shopping and I am not comparing.
Not looking for anybody who is running six conversations and calling it keeping options open, which in a pool this size means holding up six other people's year. Not looking to be a reserve. Not looking for a person who thinks there is somebody better two swipes away, because I have looked and there mostly is not.