I matched with the woman who does payroll where I work
- Looking for
- a dominant man who understands that discretion is not shame
- Experience
- Nine years, one long dynamic, quiet for the last four.
- Around
- North York, Toronto
Last month I matched with the woman who does payroll where I work. Neither of us had a face on our profile. We worked it out from a photograph of a kitchen.
Forty four, submissive, North York, and I want to sit on that for a second because nobody warns you. You assume a city this size gives you an enormous anonymous pool. It does not. It gives you a few thousand people, a good number of whom work in the same three industries you do, and the app has no setting for do not show me anybody I will have to speak to on Monday morning.
We handled it well, for what it is worth. She unmatched, I said nothing, and the following Tuesday we discussed a payroll error like adults. But I have been careful since in a way that is probably making me worse at this rather than safer.
Nine years in, one long dynamic that ended four years ago, nothing serious since.
What I want is a dominant man who understands that discretion here is not fear and is definitely not shame. I am not ashamed of any of it. I simply do not want the conversation to happen in a meeting room with a whiteboard behind me.
Not looking to be talked out of the caution. Not looking for anybody who puts their face and their employer in a bio and thinks the rest of us are cowards.