The little green dot has ruined more evenings than anything else on my phone
- Looking for
- somebody who will state at the start that a slow reply means nothing
- Experience
- Two years, one thing that lasted five months.
- Around
- downtown, Toronto
There is a green dot beside my name when the app is open, and it has ruined more evenings than anything else on this phone. If I read a message and do not answer at once, the other person can see I was there, and I can see that they can see it, and I have then sat on my hands for forty minutes drafting a reply to somebody who by now reasonably thinks I am ignoring them.
Twenty six, downtown, and yes, this is a post about anxiety, so if that is not what you are looking for it is completely fine to scroll on.
Two years in. One thing that ran five months and ended in a fade, which I am still embarrassed about, because I was the one who faded. I had left it three days and could not work out how to come back, and then it was four days, and then it was over.
What I need, and I have never asked anybody for it directly, is somebody who says plainly at the start that a slow reply means nothing. Not as reassurance in month three once it has already gone wrong. At the start, in writing, as a term of the thing.
Beyond that I want something ordinary: regular, in person, with rules, and somebody who notices whether I am eating during exam season. I lead occasionally when asked and I am not bad at it. Most of the time I want the other side.
Shared flat, cannot host, freer in the day than the evening.