Log In Sign Up

The board · Toronto · Switch

The little green dot has ruined more evenings than anything else on my phone

Posted as the_green_dot, 4 September 2026

Looking for
somebody who will state at the start that a slow reply means nothing
Experience
Two years, one thing that lasted five months.
Around
downtown, Toronto

There is a green dot beside my name when the app is open, and it has ruined more evenings than anything else on this phone. If I read a message and do not answer at once, the other person can see I was there, and I can see that they can see it, and I have then sat on my hands for forty minutes drafting a reply to somebody who by now reasonably thinks I am ignoring them.

Twenty six, downtown, and yes, this is a post about anxiety, so if that is not what you are looking for it is completely fine to scroll on.

Two years in. One thing that ran five months and ended in a fade, which I am still embarrassed about, because I was the one who faded. I had left it three days and could not work out how to come back, and then it was four days, and then it was over.

What I need, and I have never asked anybody for it directly, is somebody who says plainly at the start that a slow reply means nothing. Not as reassurance in month three once it has already gone wrong. At the start, in writing, as a term of the thing.

Beyond that I want something ordinary: regular, in person, with rules, and somebody who notices whether I am eating during exam season. I lead occasionally when asked and I am not bad at it. Most of the time I want the other side.

Shared flat, cannot host, freer in the day than the evening.

Reply to this post Replies go through your account, not this page. Nothing you send is published here.

What to have sorted before you reply

Which direction is on the table this month is not in the post, and asking flat out reads badly. That takes a conversation, and a conversation needs a room you can walk out of.

Also in Toronto

Every post in Toronto →

Reading is free. Answering needs an account.

Put one of your own where people near you will read it, and answer the ones already up.

Open the app Already have an account? Log in