Two years of an arrangement, and it lived entirely inside one account
- Looking for
- something with enough of it outside a phone to survive somebody leaving
- Experience
- Two years with one person, all of it conducted through an app.
- Around
- the east end, Toronto
We were together in every way that counted for two years and the whole of it lived in one account. Rules we had written and revised twice. A check in every night at the same hour. Two years of being known in detail. She closed the account in March, which she was entitled to do, and every word of it went at the same moment. We had ended properly the week before, so I did not lose her. I lost the proof that it had happened at all.
Forty seven, the east end, submissive, and back on here because this is where everybody in this city actually is.
I am not asking anybody to replace that. I am saying what I now know I need, which is an arrangement with enough weight outside a screen that closing something cannot delete it. Standing rules I can be held to on an ordinary Wednesday. A regular evening. Being told out loud, in a room, when I have not met the standard, instead of reading it.
I am steady, I am good at routine, and I am considerably better at this than I was two years ago because somebody patient taught me.
Not looking for a correspondence that becomes the entire event. Not looking for anyone who wants every term of it typed out before we have been in the same room. And please do not ask me to describe how the last one worked so you can run the same thing. It was hers. I would rather build a different one badly than a copy of it well.