I set the radius to four kilometres and got eleven buildings back
- Looking for
- one dominant who finishes a conversation rather than starting nine
- Experience
- Two years, one dynamic that ran seven months.
- Around
- downtown, Toronto
I set the radius to four kilometres, which downtown is not a neighbourhood. It is eleven towers, a grocery store and a construction site. Six hundred profiles inside a twenty minute walk, and I have never felt further from anybody in my life.
Twenty six, submissive, front desk at a clinic, on the app since last spring and two years into this overall. One dynamic that ran seven months and ended when he took a job in Ottawa, which at least was a reason rather than a silence.
The density is the whole problem and I want to name it properly. When there are six hundred people within walking distance, nobody has to finish anything. There is always another card. I have had eight good exchanges die at exactly the point where a real day and a real hour had to be agreed, and every one of those people is still in my area, presumably having the same conversation with somebody else.
What I want is weekly. Not an evening that gets planned for a month and then moved twice. Something with a rhythm: rules I check in against, a standing time, somebody who notices when I have gone quiet and asks rather than waiting me out.
What I do not want is an opener that goes straight to a list of activities. Anyone who wants six weeks of typing while living four minutes away. And anyone who tells me in the first message how much they hate this app, because so do I, and it is not a personality.