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The board · New York · Submissive

The app showed me a neighbour, and I have thought about nothing else since

Posted as man_on_third_floor, 5 September 2026

Looking for
somebody at least a neighbourhood away, which I know is a strange filter
Experience
Three years, all of it careful, one dynamic of a year.
Around
the Bronx, New York

Two weeks ago the app put a man from my own building in front of me. Third floor. I know his dog. I do not know whether he saw me, because I closed the app so fast that I am not sure it registered, and I have thought about very little else since.

Nothing happened and nothing is going to. But it rearranged how I use this thing. I had been treating a phone as private and it is not private, it is a window onto everybody standing within a few hundred feet of you, and some of them are people you say good morning to.

Thirty three, the Bronx, submissive, three years in. What I want has not changed: an ongoing dynamic with somebody attentive, rules that mean something on a Tuesday, a person who notices patterns in me that I miss.

What has changed is that I would like that person to live at least a neighbourhood away. I am aware this is the opposite of what everybody else on this board is asking for, and that it makes the logistics worse. I would rather have the longer trip than sit in a lift wondering.

Not looking for anyone who thinks discretion means shame. It does not, I am fine with myself, I am simply not out to a building of four hundred people. Not looking for photographs early. And not looking to be told I am overthinking it, because the last person who told me that was recognised at work eight months later.

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