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The board · Miami · Curious

There is no option on the form for not knowing yet

Posted as no_button_undecided, 20 August 2026

Looking for
conversation with somebody who will not need me to pick
Experience
None. Six weeks of an app and a lot of reading.
Around
Brickell, Miami

The sign up asked me what I am and gave me a list. There was no option for not knowing, which is the accurate answer, so I chose one at random and have been quietly living with the consequences ever since. Everybody who writes to me has read that word and drawn conclusions from it, and I spend the first three messages of every conversation correcting an impression the app created on my behalf.

Thirty two, no experience of any of this outside my own head, and six weeks of an app. I work in claims processing, Brickell, and I have known that something in this direction interests me since I was in my twenties without ever once acting on it.

What I want at this stage is to talk to somebody who has been doing this for a while and is not going to require me to have a label ready. Questions, mostly. What it is actually like. How people work out what they want without a catastrophe. Whether the certainty everybody displays on here is real or a costume.

I am not asking anybody to be my teacher and I am not going to be anybody's project. I am also not going to pretend to a certainty I do not have in order to be taken seriously, because that seems like an excellent way to end up somewhere I did not intend to go.

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What to have sorted before you reply

If this one reads like your own head rather than somebody to answer, the tactics can wait. These three all happen before there is a first match to get wrong.

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Put one of your own where people near you will read it, and answer the ones already up.

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