This is my second summer here and I finally understand the pattern
- Looking for
- somebody in it for longer than a stretch of good weather
- Experience
- Nine years elsewhere, one year of it here.
- Around
- up towards Fort Lauderdale, Miami
In my first year I thought I was doing something wrong. Conversations would build nicely for three weeks and then evaporate, and I assumed it was me. It is not me. It is that a good part of this pool is on a clock, and the clock is a lease or a contract or a season, and the ending is scheduled long before anybody writes to you. Knowing that has made me much calmer and slightly sadder.
Forty four, switch, I work in insurance adjusting, north of the city, nine years in this and only one of them here. Two arrangements before I moved, both several years long, both ended because of geography.
Now I ask early and directly how long somebody expects to be in this part of the world. Not as a test. It simply saves us both three weeks. If the answer is short, I would still enjoy a conversation and I will not be building anything on it.
What I want is a long arrangement with somebody who is also settled. I lead comfortably and I follow comfortably and I am content for that to be worked out slowly. I do not want to be somebody's introduction to this while they are here temporarily, and I do not want anybody who thinks a switch is somebody who has not made their mind up.