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The board · Miami · Switch

I changed one word on my profile and the entire queue turned over

Posted as label_changed_tuesday, 16 August 2026

Looking for
a conversation that survives whichever way round we are
Experience
Three years, mostly one direction, recently not.
Around
Wynwood, Miami

On a Tuesday in April I changed the single word describing me and watched what happened, because I was curious rather than because I had decided anything. Within two days the people appearing in my queue were unrecognisable. Different ages, different tone, different first messages, different everything. Same city, same me, same photographs. It was the clearest demonstration I have ever had that most of this is sorting rather than meeting.

Twenty eight, switch, I work in a dental practice, Wynwood, three years in this, and until recently I would have described myself with the other word without hesitating.

What I am looking for is somebody who can hold both of those in their head. I want structure and I also want to provide it, and which one I need is not a mystery I will make you solve. I will tell you. The only thing I ask is that being told does not come as an insult.

I am not looking for a teacher and I am not looking for a student, though I am happy to be a bit of each in turn. I am not looking for anybody who has decided in advance what my real orientation is. And I am not looking to have the same first conversation forty more times, which is what the last three months have been.

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What to have sorted before you reply

Which direction is on the table this month is not in the post, and asking flat out reads badly. That takes a conversation, and a conversation needs a room you can walk out of.

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