The same scene for twenty years, and I have no name for it
- Looking for
- somebody who can tell me whether what I want has a name and a normal shape
- Experience
- None. Twenty years of thinking about one thing and doing nothing.
- Around
- the Valley, Los Angeles
It is not dramatic and it is not, as far as I can tell, unusual. Somebody sets out what is expected of me for the week. I do it. At the end of it there is an accounting, in detail, where I am told what was good and what was not. That is the whole of it. I have been running that in my head since my twenties and I have never once said it out loud to another person.
Forty three, the Valley, married for a long time and single now, and completely new to all of this.
What has kept me from doing anything is a suspicion that it is too small to count. Everything I read about seems to involve much more than this, and I do not want more than this, or at least I do not want it yet.
So the question I am really asking is whether what I have described is a thing people do on its own, and whether somebody would find running it interesting rather than dull.
Not looking for anything physical to begin with. Not looking to be told that this is only the start and I will want much more soon, which may be true and is not a helpful thing to say to somebody standing at a door. And not looking to be rushed.