I do nearly all of the travelling and I want that noticed, not repaid
- Looking for
- a submissive who understands the difference between noticed and repaid
- Experience
- Seven years, two dynamics, both of them with people who could not travel.
- Around
- the south east, London
Both of my arrangements have been with people whose lives made travelling difficult, and in both cases I did four fifths of it without keeping score. I would do that again. What I want is not a fairer split, it is for the journey to be seen: an acknowledgement that the evening started an hour before I arrived, rather than a polite assumption that I simply materialise.
Thirty nine, the south east, dominant, seven years in, two arrangements with the longer at four years.
The second one ended over that, in the end. Not over the miles. Over a year of the miles being invisible, and my own stupidity in never once mentioning it until it came out badly.
So I am mentioning it at the start this time. If you cannot travel, say so and I will decide, and it will very probably be fine. If you can and would rather not, say that too, which is also an answer I can work with.
What I run is a weekly structured arrangement with expectations set out in advance, contact through the week and a review every couple of months. Not looking for anybody who will offer to travel and then never do it. Not looking to be thanked formally, which is worse. And not looking for someone who thinks a journey is only a cost if the person complains about it.