I paid for the upper tier in a city where I had already seen everybody
- Looking for
- the thing a subscription does not buy, which is somebody reading properly
- Experience
- Four years, one dynamic of eight months.
- Around
- out by the ring, Amsterdam
I bought six months of the upper tier in a city small enough that I had already seen every profile in it. Unlimited likes, in a pool I had exhausted. A boost, to be shown to people who had already scrolled past me twice. The panel that reveals who has liked you, which turned out to be nineteen people, none of whom had written to me and none of whom answered when I wrote to them.
That last part was the useful bit, in a bleak way. It told me the problem was not visibility. It was that my profile was four sentences of pleasant nothing, written to be acceptable to everybody instead of clear to anybody, and I had spent two years polishing it in the wrong direction.
Thirty four, out by the ring, submissive, four years in.
So here is the clear version. I want a dominant who is genuinely paying attention, by which I mean the kind that remembers what I said in April and asks about it in July. Structure matters to me. Correction matters to me. Titles and equipment do not matter to me at all.
Not looking for a first conversation that is a menu of activities. Not looking to be assessed. And not looking for anybody who wants to make a joke about the money, because the actual joke was that I thought the problem was outside me.