I reached the end of this city in about six weeks
- Looking for
- somebody who has just arrived, or somebody I got wrong the first time
- Experience
- Four years, three short arrangements.
- Around
- Noord, Amsterdam
About six weeks after I joined, the app ran out. Not metaphorically. It showed me a card I had already seen, then another, and then it was simply recycling. In a city this size the pool of people who want this specific thing is small enough to reach the end of, and once you have reached it you understand the board completely differently.
What follows is a strange kind of politics. You recognise everybody. You know who has been here two years and changed their photographs three times. You know which profiles are new because they are the only ones you have not read. And you become very careful about how you decline anybody, because you will see them again in three weeks, and again in three months.
Thirty six, Noord, submissive, four years in, and I have been through the whole queue enough times to have opinions about people I have never spoken to, which is not a healthy way to live.
So this post is aimed at two people. Somebody who arrived recently and has not yet worked out how small this is. Or somebody I already skipped past, who thinks I read them wrongly and is willing to say so, which has happened once and turned into the best six months I have had.
What I want is a long arrangement with a fixed shape. Not looking for an evening. Not looking for somebody who is on four apps and treating each of them as a separate city. And not looking to be told the pool is bigger than I think, because I have been to the end of it and it is not.