I have not opened my messages in three weeks, and that is the honest post
- Looking for
- one conversation, started by somebody who read more than the photographs
- Experience
- Six years, two dynamics, one of them four years.
- Around
- the east, Amsterdam
There are somewhere over two hundred unread messages on my account and I have not opened the list since the middle of May. Half this board is people writing about being ignored. I am one of the people ignoring them, and I think that version is more useful than another post about how nobody ever replies.
Here is what actually happens. The volume arrives, most of it is one word or a paragraph clearly sent to thirty people, and reading it stops feeling like meeting anybody and starts feeling like clearing a tray. Once it feels like a tray you stop seeing individuals in it. That is a failure on my part. I have reduced it rather than fixed it.
Thirty seven, the east, submissive, six years in, one dynamic that ran four years and ended when he moved back to his own country.
What I do now is read anything over three sentences, properly, once a week, sitting down in the evening. Slow and rude beats fast and absent. If you wrote to me in April and heard nothing, that was the old system and I am sorry for it.
Not looking for volume. Not looking for anybody who opens with what they would do to me. And not looking to be pursued, though I will notice a message that could only have been written to me.