From mid December I am unreachable, and I would rather say so in winter
- Looking for
- somebody who wants an arrangement that survives six weeks of very little
- Experience
- Fourteen years, three dynamics, all of them years long.
- Around
- the north shore, Sydney
Every year from about the middle of December until the end of January I am effectively unreachable. Family, a house full of people, a fortnight somewhere without decent reception. I do not check this app and I answer messages slowly if at all, and I have twice had somebody conclude in that window that they had been dropped.
So I am posting in July, six months early, because I would rather the person reading this decided now whether that is workable than discovered it at Christmas. Everything I run has to survive a long gap, and building that in from the start is the only version that has ever worked for me.
Fifty four, the north shore, dominant, fourteen years in, three dynamics all measured in years rather than months.
What that looks like in practice is written expectations rather than constant contact. Things you do daily whether or not I am watching. A weekly report I read when I can. A clear understanding that a gap is a gap and not a punishment, and a date set in advance for when normal service resumes. I am not cold, I am simply not available in the way this app trains people to expect, and I have stopped pretending otherwise.
Not looking for anyone who needs daily contact to feel secure, which is a legitimate need and not one I can meet. Not looking to be checked up on. And not looking for a person who agrees to this in July and is hurt by it in January.