I get a lot of messages and I answer almost none, and that is on me
- Looking for
- one person at a time, chosen properly rather than at random
- Experience
- Six years, two dynamics, one of them four years.
- Around
- the eastern suburbs, Sydney
I receive somewhere between thirty and fifty messages a week and I answer perhaps two. I am not writing that to boast. I am writing it because half this board is people complaining about being ignored, and I am one of the people ignoring them, and I think the honest version of that is worth more than another post about how nobody replies.
Here is what happens. The volume arrives, most of it is a single word or a paragraph clearly sent to forty people, and reading it stops feeling like meeting anybody and starts feeling like clearing a tray. Once it feels like a tray you stop seeing individuals. That is a failure on my part and I have not fixed it, only reduced it.
Thirty five, eastern suburbs, submissive, six years in, one dynamic that ran four years and ended when he moved for work.
What I have changed is that I now read anything over three sentences properly, in the evening, once a week, sitting down. Slow and rude beats fast and absent. If you wrote to me in March and heard nothing, that was the old system and I am sorry about it.
What I want is a long arrangement with somebody exacting. Not looking for volume. Not looking for a person who opens with a list of what they would do to me. Not looking to be pursued, but I will notice a message that could only have been written to me.