I do not answer outside fifteen miles, and I will explain why once
- Looking for
- somebody inside a ring I can actually reach on a weeknight
- Experience
- Eleven years, three dynamics, all of them local by design.
- Around
- the Westside, Los Angeles
It reads as arrogant and it is not, it is a conclusion. Three times I have built something good with somebody an hour away and three times it died of traffic rather than of anything either of us did. Not a row, not a betrayal, just two people slowly finding it easier not to. So the ring is fifteen miles, I have set every filter to enforce it, and when somebody outside it writes I say this in one polite paragraph and mean no insult by it.
Forty eight, the Westside, dominant, eleven years in, three arrangements, the longest five years.
Inside the ring I am generous with my time in a way I could never be outside it. A weekday evening every week rather than a heroic monthly expedition. Small things during the week that require me to be nearby. That closeness is most of what makes a dynamic feel like a dynamic instead of an event you both prepare for.
What I want is an ongoing structured arrangement with a submissive who wants the same for a long time. I set clear expectations, I revisit them, and I say what I think.
Not looking for anybody who wants to negotiate the geography. Not looking for a correspondence. And not looking for somebody who intends to move at the end of the year and has decided not to mention it until we are three months in, which has also happened.