I have not told my partner, so nothing is going to happen yet
- Looking for
- advice from people who have had this conversation and survived it
- Experience
- None. Two years of reading and one conversation I have not had.
- Around
- the west, London
I want to be extremely clear about what this post is and is not. I am in a long relationship, I have not told her about any of this, and until I have I am not going to meet anybody, talk to anybody privately, or start anything. That is not me being noble. It is that I know exactly what I would think of myself afterwards.
Forty two, the west, no experience of any of this beyond two years of reading and a growing certainty that it is not going away.
What I am actually here for is the conversation before the conversation. There must be a considerable number of people on this board who have sat where I am sitting and eventually said it out loud to somebody they love, and I would like to know how that went, including the times it went badly.
I do not know what I want it to look like afterwards. Possibly nothing changes. Possibly it becomes something we do together. Possibly she finds it unbearable, which is a real outcome and one I have thought about at length.
Not looking to be told to just tell her. Not looking for anybody who wants to talk to me in the meantime on the quiet. And not looking for reassurance that everybody feels like this, because I do not think everybody does.