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The board · Miami · Switch

The app keeps showing me people I have already decided about

Posted as queue_returns_people, 1 September 2026

Looking for
somebody new to me rather than somebody recycled
Experience
Eight years, three dynamics, one that ended for a good reason.
Around
Wynwood, Miami

Twice now the app has served me somebody I passed on eighteen months ago, and once it served me a man I had already met, already had a difficult evening with, and had specifically and deliberately blocked. He appeared with a new photograph and a slightly different name and the machine offered him up as a fresh suggestion. That is not a bug I can do anything about. It is a reason I now keep my own list.

Thirty seven, switch, I do payroll for a staffing firm, Wynwood, eight years in this. Three arrangements, one of which ended for a reason I would tell you about in person and not here.

None of this has made me suspicious of everybody. It has made me slow. I do a short video call before I meet anybody, I tell a friend where I am going, and I do not treat the app's endorsement of a profile as any kind of endorsement at all.

What I want is an ongoing arrangement, both directions, with somebody who thinks that is all sensible rather than dramatic. I lead well and I follow well. I do not want anybody who has to be persuaded that caution is compatible with actually enjoying this, because it is, and I am proof.

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What to have sorted before you reply

Which direction is on the table this month is not in the post, and asking flat out reads badly. That takes a conversation, and a conversation needs a room you can walk out of.

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