I arrived expecting a community and found a queue, and I had to adjust
- Looking for
- people to know as well as somebody to build something with
- Experience
- Four years, one dynamic of a year, and very few people to talk to.
- Around
- the east, London
I came to this expecting to find a group of people who knew each other. What is actually here is a line of individuals facing forwards, none of whom knows any of the others, all of whom are having the same conversation separately. That is not a criticism of anybody. It is just a completely different thing from what I imagined when I downloaded it, and it took me two years to stop being disappointed about it.
Thirty four, the east, switch, four years in, one arrangement of a year that ended when he moved away.
The practical consequence is loneliness of a specific kind: I have done this for four years and I know nobody who also does it. Everything I have learned came from strangers who are no longer in my life. Nothing checks my judgement except my own experience.
So this post is asking for two things. An arrangement, either direction, with structure and a weekly rhythm. And separately, people to know, which I am aware is not what this application is for.
Not looking for anybody who thinks wanting friends is a coded request. Not looking for a group of any kind. And not looking to be told that I should go to things, because that advice assumes a life I do not currently have.